Christianese: "May you be glorified"

We should make a dictionary of all the Christianese terms we use. I probably don't have time to finish this post since I have to be outta here in 5 minutes, but today God had me reflect on what "bringing Him glory" REALLY meant.

So many times we pray, "God may you be glorified through this....I pray that I can give you glory....may we give you glory through our worship...Take all the glory during our retreat..."

But what does that look like? If you were to break it down to a non-churched person what giving God the glory was about, what would you say?

We never use the term glory in our everyday conversations with people - "May you be glorified through your championship meet later pal!" "Girllll you look super glorious today!"

So I wanna hear from you: How would we know if our prayer of "God may you be glorified" was fulfilled? What would be different?

Back on track in the back of my 'lac

(see the wayyyy bottom of this post to cop this album!)

Wuddup blogworld! It's been a while since I've been here, but lately I've been feeling like God's been wanting me to share what He's put on my heart. I want to thank Him for the way He's been waking me up in the mornings before the sun's out to spend unhurried time with Him. Even though I am NOT a morning person, never HAVE been, and didn't think I ever WOULD be, it just shows i'm not waking up by my own willpower, right? Especially now that I have a cuddlebear husband now. In fact, I fall asleep in the middle of praying to Him often. But He just put this desire in me that WANTS me to get up and be with Him...thank you God, it has been so worth it.

At first it wasn't easy. Not the waking up part, the things that God would call me out on. First of all, i HATE constructive criticism. Even when people say it's supposed to help, it just makes me want to punch you in the face. I don't need you telling me how to run things (old self talk). But to have God call you out is another thing. Things like my lack of integrity - how i don't follow up with what i say, my lies to get out of trouble, how my words and actions aren't consistent....My self-righteousness - how i get prideful about my spiritual highs, feel holier than everyone else, put on a spiritual front on the outside like I'm all kinds of put together....and most recently, my selfishness - how I care only about my life, my career, my school, my goals, myself me me me, to the point where the ministry God called me to has shown deterioration.

I'm not trying to be hard on myself, but God is calling me to grow...or should I say shrink. Less of me, and more of Christ. God is calling Christ in me to reveal His glory. Today, God showed an aspect of what it means for Christ to be our very life. Not a part of it, not just on 3131 Bowers, not just when we pray, not just when we have our Wed night meetings. But Christ is all and in all fa sho! When Jesus says, "I am the life", it's not just one of those things we respond to and say, "That's nice Jesus. Thanks for the reminder. And then?" When Jesus says he is our life, HE is the one who directs this physical body, from our thoughts to our actions. I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. -Galatians 2:20

Every day holds moments for the light of Christ to shine within us, no matter what we're doing. It's not about close we feel to Him, or being conscious of Him every moment, or even seeing how God is working in our external circumstances. Those are rare moments when we recognize how God is working in life's circumstances. But just as Jesus was in the Father, and the Father was in Him, we have the potential of that same relationship as well. Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. -John 14:10-11

Jesus is in us, and we are in Him. For Christ to be our life is Christ, "living in me, who is doing his work". We often wait passively for Jesus to do his thing. We look for Jesus in everywhere but ourselves. We wait for a huge revival in our youth group. We expect that one day, we'll have that moment of a holy experience with God that suddenly changes us. I'm sure some of us are waiting for the retreat this weekend to happen to see Jesus. But Jesus is already in us, so what are we waiting for? Let HIM live your life - it belongs to Him. Let HIM use your life to do what HE needs to do at this point of history in this particular location with the specific people he's put in your lives. We can fool ourselves thinking we have faith and we are waiting for something glorious to happen to us, but we don't let Christ's life be ACTIVE in us. Not that God doesn't have big things planned in our futures, he totally does. But our trust in Him isn't just for the long-term, it's in every moment. Sounds abstract, doesn't it? God's been using the youth ministry lately to show me what this means...

You may or may not have heard there have been some individual cases exposed in the youth group where our kids be doin what they aint supposed to be doin. Imma be real and say that even among our own Thomas group we may have these cases too. Hearing about these have been very discouraging, have made me feel like a failure to this "flock", even made me think condemning thoughts towards these people: "You're doing the worst thing possible", "You grew up in this church...you should know better...what are you thinking..." Then I try to think of all the strategies, plans, changes that need to be made for our group.

But God's timing could never be better in giving me time to reflect on His Word and receive Him. The more I receive His word, the more the life of Christ becomes active and I see how he changes me to see things....Oswald Chambers had a quote the other day that went "God has established things so that prayer, on the basis of redemption, changes the way a person looks at things. Prayer is not a matter of changing things externally, but one of working miracles in a person’s inner nature."

I was in the word in John 11 today, how Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. Jesus saw Lazarus' sickness as something that would be an opportunity for God's glory. In fact, even though he got the message when Lazarus was still alive, he waited until Lazarus DIED until he came to Mary and Martha. So by the time Mary and Martha saw Jesus, they were like "If only you were here, my brother would not have died." In the back of my mind I imagined them thinking "Thanks A LOT Jesus for your delay. What took you so long??" But of course Jesus assured them that He is the RESURRECTION and the LIFE. He wanted everyone to believe Him when they would see his glorious power of raising Lazarus from the dead. He could have just healed Lazarus and prevented him from dying. But He was even more glorious through giving Lazarus life after dying!

God is helping me see that these weaknesses, problems, limitations in the youth ministry are not an end in itself, like Lazarus' death. They are opportunities to trust Him and see his glorious power! Yes, what I can see is apathy and indifference, dead worship sessions, and silence during communion. But what I see is not the reality of Christ. The reality is that Christ is the life-giver and when He is my life, I can only be confident in Him. When Christ is my life, HIS mercy and compassion goes out to those who stumble in our youth group. When Christ is my life, I don't need to rely on myself and my "youth expertise" to come up with strategies, plans, and changes. I rely on Him. He sees beyond what I can see. When Christ is my life, there is no fear of looking like a failure before others. When Christ is my life, I don't decide my agenda for the day, He does. When Christ is my life, I don't speak out of my own stuttering simple words, He gives me the words to speak. When Christ is my life, I don't see my holiness, I see my own sin not everyone else's and the only righteousness in me in Christ. When Christ is my life, the answer is not more helpers in the youth ministry, an English pastor, or even more passion. These may all be helpful, but these will all fade. The answer is in Christ alone! And it starts with realizing the life in Christ in myself, not even in relation to the youth ministry. Just Him in me and me in Him. And when the life of Christ overflows like "rivers of living water" (John 7:38) in me, and in you, and in His church, then we can finally see Jesus in all his glory. What are we waiting for???

Wow this was ridiculously long...I need to start updating this more often so I don't make a blog dump again!

***For all you hip hop fans, Jin has a new album out called "Crazy love ridiculous faith". He was reppin Asians on 106 n park back in the day, used to rap about crazy worldly stuff, then got saved, and now He's reppin Christ in his flows! This album is off the chainzzzzz

http://www.rapzilla.com/rz/music/freemp3s/4959-mc-jin-crazy-love-ridiculous-faith

Christ is the REALITY

Colossians 2:17

Before Melissa moved out to live with a boy, I felt like God was putting it on my heart to look for a non-Christian roommate. Part of it was because I felt like the next step of my spiritual life is to be challenged in sharing the gospel with the people around me. I've felt like this for a long time, however, I never had the boldness to actually do it with someone who isn't part of my family. I found our Venus on craigslist and she seemed like a nice and quiet girl. She was also down when I told her we had Bible studies at our house on occasion. 

So Venus has been living at our house for a month now. So far, I've only attempted to reach out to her twice. The first time was when I had a BBQ reunion with some friends from Intervarsity at my community pool. I asked her to come and I reminded myself to give her a disclaimer that we're all Christian. I also wanted to tell her that we were going to say grace for the meal but if she felt uncomfortable, then she doesn't have to do it. The truth was that I was EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE with her feeling out place with my friends. During the reunion, I was about to give her a heads up when my friend Grace suddenly asked me to bless the food. I was so nervous because I didn't want Venus to feel uncomfortable. But I did it anyway. After reflecting on that moment, I was convicted and rebuked by Jesus. I was reminded of this verse:

"For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek." Romans 1:16

Silly me... to think that Venus would be offended by my actions to glorify God. I lived in fear because I didn't believe that the power of the gospel. God isn't some one to be ashamed of. We are blessed because the reality is that we know Him and we belong to a loving, gracious, sovereign KING!

Be the Change You Hope to See

Mann it's the second week of finals and all I gotta say is God is good!  I don't know how I'm doing on the finals (in fact i'm pretty sure i'm doing really poorly) but despite all that I just feel this inexplainable and slightly illogical peace with everything.  The other day I was standing outside the library stressing when this dude from my class comes up and asked if he could pray for me! How awesome is that?!  Little things like that just keep reassuring me that God is looking out for me, that He holds my future in His hands, and I got nothing to worry about.  I just need to learn to be faithful with the opportunities He's given me and seek every opportunity to bring glory to Him.

This past Friday at CLF, Melissa's friend Harrie (or however you spell it) came and shared to the youth about the importance of knowing God for yourself.  Afterwards, she stressed this to the counselors, telling us that if we can't expect to shove fire and passion for God down the youths' throats if we're not displaying it ourselves.  Fire is contagious, but it needs to start with us.  Will spoke on a similar topic this past Sunday, and he asked us to pray that his fire would be reignited so that it could be passed to us, so definitely keep him in your prayers.  At the same time, we shouldn't wait for him to get reignited in order to get our fire started.  We need to be praying for ourselves and for each other that the passion will burn and catch on, and that has to start with a daily walk and personal relationship with Jesus.  That means keeping up with devotions, not just to cross it off your list but actually enjoying your time with the Lord.  That means coming on Sundays EXPECTING to pray. That means sitting with the youth and encouraging them to express their praises to our Lord.  That means getting off our spiritual butts!  Man I wish I wasn't leaving for the summer because I know God's going to be doing some amazing work in the English Ministry this summer and I wish I were going to be here to see it.  Nevertheless I can't wait to hear the praise reports from across the Pacific about how the Spirit is leading and guiding this group.  But it has to start with us!

Lastly, Will asked us in the sermon what our purpose in life was; what is the one thing you are living for that you are also willing to die for?  I gotta be honest, when I first decided to attend law school my purpose was so that I could use the law to help people and bring glory to God.  But in just the one year I've been in here, my focus as all been on getting job interviews, getting a job at a firm, getting good work experience, yadda yadda.  I used to dream about having my own practice and being able to help those who needed it most (like Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, and get paid in a sack of potatoes or something), but recently all my dreams are about what area I want to practice, and where I'm going to work after law school, and in how many years do I want to make partner and pay off my loans.  Somewhere along the line, this blessing from God of getting into law school and using it as a vehicle to serve Him as become so discombobulated that now it's all about me and my glory and my future and aspirations.  God wants us to have plans and goals, but ultimately He needs to be the center of what we do, not ourselves.  Please pray for me that God will realign my will with His and I would submit to His more perfect plan for my life.  Thanks :)

Prayer Request

Aaron - finals week is beginning next week; worried and stressed out. Be diligent where God has called him. Kathy - lots of things coming up: work, pcat, pharmacy school apps; body image David - didn't pray. Shame on you. Struggling with quiet times with God. Skipping devotionals have created a disconnect from God. Praise God for job interview!! Be sensitive to where God is leading him. Melissa - feeling inadequate in her position. Never been a leader, she has always been a cooperator. Doesn't know if she's being faithful to His calling. Shes more concerned with the ministry rather than being connected with God. Jaclyn - good retreat; final presentation next week Arthur - being a light at work. Prayer during meal time - not being in such a rush all the time. Working on Bible reading.

Prayer Requests

Jaclyn- continue to be committed to doing Bible study with Rachel every night. It's good to be a lonely woman :) rainbow retreat this weekend.

Kathy- passion for God is there but the discipline is not. Pray for discipline and passion to come together.

Arthur- pray that he'll start reading the Bible and let his coworkers know he's a Christian.

Melissa- no time for Jesus since she has been back. Pray for friends and to be bold to share the gospel. Seek after God first.

David- work has been hard. Looking for another job. Direct disobedience towards God.

Aaron- very very burnt out. Too many roles and not getting fed enough. Pray for solid devotional life.

When Satan knocks at your door, simply say, "Jesus, can you get that?"

HalleYOOLAH!

 At that time Jesus prayed this prayer: "O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, thank you for hiding these things from those who think themselves wise and clever, and for revealing them to the childlike. Yes, Father, it pleased you to do it this way!" -Matthew 11:25-26

Don't you miss being a kid? When life was about playing Polly Pockets, talking to your stuffed animals, not feeling bad about eating cookies, and singing Disney songs while dancing around the house in your onesie? Now we gotta worry about how we'll pay our tuition, rent, and find a career. We gain more life-experience so we don't need our parents to take care of us anymore and be what Ne-Yo wants us to be - Miss Indepennnnndent, that's why I love herrr...

But the more experience we gain, the more responsibilities we take on for ourselves and eventually for our own family and sooner than later it's a big ol' burden on our shoulders. What a relief that our Savior says: "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." -Matthew 11:28-30

What is your burden right now? What's heavy on your heart? What are you having doubts about? 

Are you trying to lighten the load by figuring things out on your own? Doing more? Trying harder?

Right now my heavy burden comes from tryna make everyone happy. Don't offend people. Don't make this person mad at you. Be everyone's friend. Saying "no" will make them mad at you. It's my responsibility to do and be what everyone else wants. In my ministry, this looks like taking on more tasks, reading more books, gaining more experience so I'll stop being inadequate and know all there is to know about youth ministry. There's nothing wrong with gaining experience and life skills, but it becomes a problem when we become TOO independent and stop depending on our Lord, our Father. 

We are still his children, but at this stage in our lives we are pressured to grow-up FAST. Then we think we "got it" when we don't. We act like we don't need Him, but we do. And this is what I love about kids and young people: They know they still need someone to care for them. Yeah, teenagers act like they know it all but in reality they know they are useless and can't really live without their parents still. 

At my old job, I used to work with this little boy I'll call EP (his initials). EP used to hate showering and getting ready for bed. But I worked with him long enough to the point where he trusted me as someone who cared for him. Then it would start getting easier to get him to shower and get ready for bed by having him do random things. To him, it was random, but to me, I had a plan. I would use his Yoda to talk to him in a "Yoda voice" and say things like "Shower, You must." And he would shower! And then I'd sing him a song about brushing his teeth using a T-rex puppet, and he would brush his teeth while singing the song! But he knew he needed help and had someone who cared for him enough that he trusted me enough to do the random things I told him to. 

So remember that you don't have to have it all together, all the answers, everything under control, and all the life experience. As long as you remember you'll never be too grown to be independent from God the Father, you're right where you need to be. Trust him not only with the big life decisions, but EVERYTHING. As soon as something troubles you, who do you turn to? Yourself, your boyfriend, girlfriend, bestie, google, yo mama, or your ABBA FATHER? No wonder why Jesus said his yoke is easy and his burden is light. We are never alone - we know God our Father loves as his children, Jesus walks with us understanding every aspect of our human life, and the Holy Spirit is our counselor. 

So enjoy the videos below and understand why God reveals His truth to the childlike and says the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like children! HalleYOOOLAH!

You have to hear this girl in the beginning and her prayer at the end. Okay I cried a little.

Love costs ERRTHANG

"And all nations will hate you because you are my followers. But everyone who endures to the end will be saved...

Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell.

If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it." -Matthew 10:22, 38-39

Watching that video above made me feel so small about my faith. It makes me feel embarrassed to share my prayer requests around my work, my school, and my wedding. Not that we shouldn't trust God with these things in our lives, but it just shows our real main concerns going on right now. For the God who lived an extreme life for me on earth, it doesn't make sense for me to live a mediocre life to God. 


This all came from reading Matthew 10. I was just ALL confused after reading this passage. I questioned:


1.) Why did Jesus give the disciples authority to cast out evil spirits and heal every kind of disease and illness RIGHT after he called them? What happened to their training?
2.) Why is this not normal for us who call ourselves Christians aka Christ-followers to do these kinds of things today? Is this even possible for us or are we just lacking faith?
4.) Was this warning about persecution only for them or for us too? Because I aint worried about being whipped for my faith anytime soon...

It just seemed like one of those Bible passages that only applied back in the day...but not for us today. And I had no answers, but God did prompt me to confess some things: missing opportunities to acknowledge Jesus before some people so I wouldn't look like a "Jesus freak", allowing myself to dwell on impure thoughts for my own enjoyment, refusing to forgive because I feel like i deserve an apology, seeking for myself to be noticed and acknowledged in front of others, etc...the list goes on and on...but the common denominator to all that is ME wanting to live MY life and do thangs MY way. 


YOLO is the motto right? I mean, we're only young once. We aint getting younger so don't we have the right to live a little? These thoughts still go through my mind sometimes, missing the good ol' days before I got saved and started feeling convicted about sin. But when I got saved, "making the most out of college" took on a whole different meaning. Life went to endless freedom from parents/restrictions to living for Christ ONLY. 


To this day, I still struggle with DEVOTION to him. I see how far these persecuted Christians across the world go to the point of being killed for expressing their faith in our Lord. How far are we willing to go for Him? Once someone called me "a little extreme" when I was expressing my faith in Jesus. That alone made me feel like a loser. 


I guess what I'm tryna say is we gotta stop every once in a while and assess who we really living for. It's like the seesaw effect - we can only have one higher than the other. If we let ourselves take the higher place, then we are less devoted to Christ, and if Christ is at the highest place which he should be at, then we're at the bottom - giving up "life's privileges" (which have no comparison with the "divine privileges" (phil 2:7) Christ gave up.)


Let's express our devotion to him today by re-focusing on our mission here wherever we're at, whatever time it is. Right before Jesus sent out his disciples he looked out at all those people and had compassion on them and knowing he was only one person, he said: "The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields."


We are the workers now! And we do have the power to do what the disciples did, as long as we trust and believe that Jesus HIMSELF is working and speaking through us. Let's go hard for Him and not have a lukewarm, wimpy faith. We can do more powerful and glorious works for His Kingdom depending on how powerful and glorious we view our King!!!

Let's not give up...the fullness of our reward is coming....everything is for JESUS, no matter the cost! Are we ready to change our prayers from:

"God, help me get good grades and do well in my job. Thank you for this food. Make these kids listen to me. Help me plan a fancy wedding." 

-to-

"God, do whatever it takes in my life to bring you the most glory, give me strength to face the upcoming hardships of being your true follower. My cross - BRING IT ON! Jesus ONLY Jesus EVER!"

 

BALLIN'

My Evangelism Story

My best friend, Melissa, our freshman year.

Basketball has been a huge part of my life since I was in 4th grade. It became more significant in middle school when Melissa (who didn't even like me at first) invited me to play for her church league. Well, what she forgot to mention was that in order to play in the league, I had to go to church. So I sat through Sunday after Sunday for two years, doodling and sketching on my sermon notes and skipping Sunday school to go to Carl's Junior :) Melissa never shared the "gospel" to me in words, but her family lived it out in the way that they treated me - like I was their own daughter. Her dad spent his Saturdays and Sundays driving us to basketball practice and games for 3 years. Her mom did the same, and even invited me to their family gatherings. They were the family that lived out Christ's love and I honestly believe that was the best exposure to the gospel someone can ever have.

I guess sitting through Sunday sermons for 3 years finally worked. I remember Pastor Cory from Evergreen SGV gave a message on the heart of the Father. That morning, he made an alter call (as he did every Sunday), and something was different. I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to raise my hand because deep down inside, I really wanted to be loved by God. So I accepted Christ that day, without really understanding what that meant for my life. I thought being a Christian meant that I had to accept Jesus into my heart and then go to church every Sunday. I had this misconception for a few years until I went to college and recommitted my life (forreal this time!) to Jesus based on a similar message at Intervarsity.

I met with Jojo on Monday night and I asked her what her favorite part about SG was. She said that she really liked our groups "Culture Shock", where I give the group the background/ context of the passage. She said that when she's trying to tell her friends about Jesus, the first thing she wants to be able to share with them is WHY the Bible is true and all the facts about it. My weakness was that I didn't know the fundamental truths about God when I first accepted Christ. I love that SVCA is so focused on Bible truths - because God's Word is infallible and it breathes life into us. SVCA youth know that God is the ultimate Creator of the universe, the Author of Salvation and He is this HUGE God! But this is just ONE out of many aspects of who He is. He is also the Heavenly Daddy, the Father who cares for us so deeply that He knows EVERY SINGLE HAIR ON OUR HEADS. Psalms 139 tells us that He thought of us, not just when we were born, but from the very beginning of time. He had already imagined EVERYTHING about us!

So thanks Melissa, and the Gotos for showing me Christ's love through the way they loved me! :D