You all know me well enough to know that I am always notoriously LATE. This has gone way back to my elementary school days. One time I begged my mom to let me be absent from school because I started an art project too late - making a catholic calendar with mosaic, stained glass, painted pictures of mary/saints/Jesus. It had to be perfect. My perfectionism didn't let me turn in any of my art projects because they weren't good enough. So in 5th grade I got an F in art for not turning anything in, even though I did all of them! And when my big Samoan classmate saw my report card, he shouted it out to everyone that I FAILED in art! Traumatized fo life mang.
Anyways! You get the point. I have a problem with being on time. YES you may have reading in my recent posts that I've been able to get up early with God's grace. The only times I have is when I've blogged about it, so that's like 2 times! On the real though, I have a hard time waking up early. In high school I had to take guarana pills to keep me awake at school. So this morning David called me at almost 10 to see if I wanted donuts, and I was still at home even though my work starts at 10. He called me out on my habit of being late for work. And he was right in saying that I'm actually okay with that. So naturally, I got all kinds of defensive and pointed back at him that HE was late for work sometimes too. And that I don't appreciate him calling me out and ruining my morning. It's just that one thing about me I KNOW I'm weak in and I hate that part about myself. After the Lord knocked some sense into me and showed me my wrong (double call-out), I apologized. Still feeling a little indignant, I was going to add something like, "I just don't like it when people call me out on my character, like 'you're ALWAYS late..that's who you are'". But it's not their problem! It's my own. If I let Christ be my life, even in this area, I'd never be late. Obviously if people say that, they still see my old-self Melissa in me.
Well since it's one of those things I'm known for, God taking over this weakness would really be a testimony to Him. More than just self-improvement, I need to let the main reason for Him taking over is that His glory, his character, his presence in me is displayed. God is never late. His timing is ALWAYS perfect. I came to a desperation point about this same thing over a year ago, and it makes me upset that this issue is still the same. So as I was driving to work, reflecting on this and talking with Him, God made a good point:
"If I am really your King, would you honor the appointments we have set together? No matter how early it is, how tired you are, how much sleep you've had, would you show up on time for our appointment?"
Lately, we've been going through knowing Christ as having the SUPREMACY (Colossians 1:15-18). We've been going over this at our retreat, Will talked about Christ being our Lord this past Sunday, and now we're going through Hebrews about Christ being SUPERIOR above all. He is our supreme, superior King, the highest of highest, with the name above all other names, the one who established all thrones and powers and rulers and authorities - who became human to suffer death for us. By His grace, he became the lowest of lows, a cursed and punished human criminal to go through the death sentence that was planned for us. He gave us HIS holiness, HIS glory, HIS righteousness to us for FREE! So naturally He has every right to take authority of our lives, do whatever He wants with us, command us, make decisions for us, interrupt our plans, give and take away, change us, use us, reign over all in our lives, and reign in us as our King. All because He is WORTHY....
But yet, even as I set my alarms for 7:45 am classes on Saturdays, 8:30 worship rehearsals, 1:1 appointments with friends, meetings, etc...when it comes to my King, I treat Him casually like He can wait. I think, "God's always here...I can meet with Him when it's convenient for me." I never see it like He's actually waiting for me first thing in the mornings. But Christ is my KING. He is the King I report to, and when I come to Him to spend quality time with Him, I'm coming before His throne of grace. I am subject to Him and I owe Him my life. How could I be late or a no-show to my morning appointments with my King because I'm too tired and think, "That's okay. He can wait until later. He'll still be here right? God's always with me." I wouldn't be late to an appointment that the President sets for me, or even the mayor, or even my boss. Since Christ is superior to all as being the one through whom all rulers, authorities, powers, and thrones were established in heaven and on earth, how can I treat Him as the least of these?
I'm thankful that the Lord put this in perspective for me, but it will take surrender more than discipline. I pray that as I surrender my right to myself and my will to take my time, sleep a little longer, relax for a bit, and even be perfect, Christ can take over and his character will show more and more. Jesus is never late. I pray that our quality time would be all about focusing on Him and letting go of all distractions, giving Him my undivided attention.
I realize that as I write this, I am being held accountable. So hopefully I can willingly yield this weakness to Christ because He is more than sufficient. "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest in me." -2 Cor 12:9.
In all this, I just want to treat Christ as my King, without letting my weaknesses be an excuse. Now that David and I have started a new family, I try to guard our family time by having at least one date night a week. We can get so busy with our ministries, and I'm still trying to not bring youth ministry stuff home with me. Our date night is sacred, and our schedules must work around that. How much more should my quality time with my King be even MORE sacred, guarded, and prioritized?
I encourage you all to treat your quality time with our Lord as "appointments with our King". We need to have a deep reverence and respect for our time with Him. But how awesome is it that Christ has made it possible for us to still "approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and grace to help us in our time of need" (Hebrews 4:16)? As HOLY and SUPREME as He is, He opened the life-giving way to be personal and intimate with Him. What an awesome King we have!
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Total submission
Last night before I fell asleep, I was pleading with the Lord to give me enough time to spend with Him in the first parts of my day. Me and David's plans to run at night are failing on us too, so I needed to just get exercise over with in the morning. But it has been awesome to spend unhurried time with the Lord in the mornings, just to be with Him and enjoy Him in the quietness. I didn't want exercise to cut into that. I asked God to wake me up whenever He wanted to in the morning, to give me just enough time to hang out with Him.
Well guess what! He woke me up at 3 am, and I couldn't fall back asleep. At first I was like, "Oh WHAT! I'm going back to sleep." But I couldn't. God was already waiting. So I got up, made coffee and had the best morning evaaaar! He didn't let me doze off or get distracted. He has given me enough energy throughout today. There is nothing like hanging out with Jesus - to recognize you're in the presence of a Holy God, to contemplate on his qualities, to have Him open His Word to you, to be filled and refreshed by His Holy Spirit. Draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you! (James 4:8)
Today we got the email about Kathy's roommate Venus who asked to come to our next fellowship meeting. How awesome is that! Kathy made the point that God does all the work, and all we have to do is ask. It's so true! There is nothing to small to ask God, even if it has to do with waking you up to hang out with Him. We just gotta trust Him and give Him credit where credit is due! Which is everything!
Please please please make it a priority, schedule it in if necessary, to hang out with Jesus. I liked how during our past retreat, Pastor Brian made so many analogies to his relationship with His wife, as the way we treat Jesus. There is never an excuse of having no time or being too tired. What if your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend said "I can only talk to you for a little because I have to leave for work in 10 minutes. And only I get to talk to you. When I get home from work later, I will be too tired to hang out with you, and I need to relax which doesn't have anything to do with you." Whaaaat??? We were created BY Him and FOR Him. How can we let our lives have nothing to do with Him? All we have to do is ASK. See what happens!
Our King is so awesome. He is above all and existed before time and space. He created all things, including all thrones, powers, rulers, and authorities which makes Him the highest of the highest authority. All things were created FOR Him, and He holds all things together. If He took His hand away or turned his face away, we'd be in complete chaos. But our King who is the highest of highs made himself the lowest of lows. He submitted to His Father's plans and willingly received suffering, isolation, and death. He didn't use His infinite power to stop God's plans, to fight against the soldiers arresting Him, to break the chains they bound Him in, to escape and hide from them, to stop your disciples from leaving Him, to stop the soldiers from mocking and beating Him. He could've stopped all this with one word. No, Christ as our King submitted to His Father, and even as everyone thought they were finally in control, God was still in control, fulfilling all his promises and prophecies. Christ was obedient to death - even death on a cross! (Philippians 2:8) And through all this, we, God's enemies, became God's righteousness, and Christ took our place as the criminal to be punished.
Since Christ as the highest of highs became the lowest of lows, letting the Father do whatever He wanted to Him, will we allow Christ to do whatever He wants with us? Or do we still feel entitled to our lives? As if our lives belong to us and are for us? "No servant is greater than His master" (John 15:20). Jesus is our KING. We have a King to bow down to and report to. Let's treat Him as such. Let's give Him every little decision. Let nothing be out of impulse. "Lord I have free time right now, how do you want me to spend it? Lord I've had such a long week, can I hang out with you to relax? Lord who do you want to bless through me today? Lord feel free to interrupt my day to do your thang." God has everything to do with every little thing - your drives to and from work, your emails, your down time, your laundry, your cleaning, your time catching up with friends, your TV watching, your homework, your exercising, your texts, your teeth brushing, and getting ready for bed at night. How can we allow God to have His way, to be available for His use, in even the most menial ordinary things? Then it will be so natural to let God have His way when the trials come!
submit submit submit submit submit submit submit submit. JESUS IS OUR KING!
Well guess what! He woke me up at 3 am, and I couldn't fall back asleep. At first I was like, "Oh WHAT! I'm going back to sleep." But I couldn't. God was already waiting. So I got up, made coffee and had the best morning evaaaar! He didn't let me doze off or get distracted. He has given me enough energy throughout today. There is nothing like hanging out with Jesus - to recognize you're in the presence of a Holy God, to contemplate on his qualities, to have Him open His Word to you, to be filled and refreshed by His Holy Spirit. Draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you! (James 4:8)
Today we got the email about Kathy's roommate Venus who asked to come to our next fellowship meeting. How awesome is that! Kathy made the point that God does all the work, and all we have to do is ask. It's so true! There is nothing to small to ask God, even if it has to do with waking you up to hang out with Him. We just gotta trust Him and give Him credit where credit is due! Which is everything!
Please please please make it a priority, schedule it in if necessary, to hang out with Jesus. I liked how during our past retreat, Pastor Brian made so many analogies to his relationship with His wife, as the way we treat Jesus. There is never an excuse of having no time or being too tired. What if your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend said "I can only talk to you for a little because I have to leave for work in 10 minutes. And only I get to talk to you. When I get home from work later, I will be too tired to hang out with you, and I need to relax which doesn't have anything to do with you." Whaaaat??? We were created BY Him and FOR Him. How can we let our lives have nothing to do with Him? All we have to do is ASK. See what happens!
Our King is so awesome. He is above all and existed before time and space. He created all things, including all thrones, powers, rulers, and authorities which makes Him the highest of the highest authority. All things were created FOR Him, and He holds all things together. If He took His hand away or turned his face away, we'd be in complete chaos. But our King who is the highest of highs made himself the lowest of lows. He submitted to His Father's plans and willingly received suffering, isolation, and death. He didn't use His infinite power to stop God's plans, to fight against the soldiers arresting Him, to break the chains they bound Him in, to escape and hide from them, to stop your disciples from leaving Him, to stop the soldiers from mocking and beating Him. He could've stopped all this with one word. No, Christ as our King submitted to His Father, and even as everyone thought they were finally in control, God was still in control, fulfilling all his promises and prophecies. Christ was obedient to death - even death on a cross! (Philippians 2:8) And through all this, we, God's enemies, became God's righteousness, and Christ took our place as the criminal to be punished.
Since Christ as the highest of highs became the lowest of lows, letting the Father do whatever He wanted to Him, will we allow Christ to do whatever He wants with us? Or do we still feel entitled to our lives? As if our lives belong to us and are for us? "No servant is greater than His master" (John 15:20). Jesus is our KING. We have a King to bow down to and report to. Let's treat Him as such. Let's give Him every little decision. Let nothing be out of impulse. "Lord I have free time right now, how do you want me to spend it? Lord I've had such a long week, can I hang out with you to relax? Lord who do you want to bless through me today? Lord feel free to interrupt my day to do your thang." God has everything to do with every little thing - your drives to and from work, your emails, your down time, your laundry, your cleaning, your time catching up with friends, your TV watching, your homework, your exercising, your texts, your teeth brushing, and getting ready for bed at night. How can we allow God to have His way, to be available for His use, in even the most menial ordinary things? Then it will be so natural to let God have His way when the trials come!
submit submit submit submit submit submit submit submit. JESUS IS OUR KING!
Friday, September 7, 2012
"Christ Alone" Retreat 2012!
an answer to our prayers
praying with our pastors
Jesus is in the middle!
one big happy family <3
2-face
failed attempt
sam h. is barely hanging in there - other sam: straight chillin
looking for their target Clement
this just looks like a conga line on knees
before hao faked his injury
svca cheer squad
where are jeffrey and sam's feet?
she believes she can fly
our broke-back model
this lasted 2 seconds
time for a feet tan
something's asymmetrical about this
you can spot the weak link here
and here
cheng developing more inspiring quotes
my nostrils flared like a bull seeing red
Just Aks.
Tuesday morning after retreat, it was so hard to get up after such a deep sleep. I wasn't sure whether I had to go to the church office that day. David told me to ask Ellen ayi before leaving just to make sure. But I didn't want to bother her in the morning with my question. So I showed up to work anyway and of course, no one was there. THEN i called and asked Ellen ayi, and it turns out not only did she communicate this to me on Thursday before the retreat, but she had sent out an email to the whole church! I let David have his "I told you so" moment. As I was driving back home, the question kept repeating in my head, "Why didn't I just ASK her?"
I believe God wonders the same question for us all the time. "Why don't you just ask me?" When I don't ask God, it's because I don't believe I will receive from Him, not because I think I'm bothering Him like my fear of bothering Ellen ayi. Well, sometimes yeah I do feel like I'm bothering Him, if I'm asking for small things that don't seem related to God at all - like, me getting out of bed in the morning. But THANK God that not only He knows us, but he makes all things known to us through His Spirit (John 16:13-15). And one aspect He lets us know about Him is that we can be assured that if we ask Him anything in Jesus' name, he will give to us. Why? Because when we ask from God, we demonstrate how much we really trust Him. I struggle with praying, with communicating with God, and I only ask and seem to pray when I'm already desperate.
For example as a new wife, I am learning how to be a helper to my husband - to help my husband be the man God wants him to be. But I have a dilemma: If I confront him about some things and tell Him to live in Christ, I might put pressure on him to change with higher expectations than can be handled at this point. But if I don't say anything and let things go, I might appear to be supportive or not caring at all. So out of desperation, I asked God: "What do I do?" What a comforter He is. He reminded me that there is a way to be proactive without being controlling and self-righteous. By praying for my husband CONSISTENTLY (keyword), I'm letting God do his thing within him so in the end, God gets all the credit, not me. In the end, I can say that God changed him as He has already changed him so far. What I cannot do, God can. But until now, I didn't ask God about this matter at all! So before I can pray for David to truly trust in God, I need to trust God myself.
Far much more than mass murder, the world's greatest sin is refusing to believe in Jesus (John 16:8-9), and our only righteousness is by faith in Jesus. Romans 1:17: "For in the gospel a righteousness in God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: 'The righteous will live by faith.'" Our faith is changing all the time, it's dynamic, so we need to get to the point of always trusting in Jesus. Watch out for self-sufficiency. Lately, I've been getting into reading, especially in regards to youth ministry and spiritual leadership. I have to be careful that by gaining more knowledge in these matters, by gaining knowledge about counseling youth through my grad school, that I don't drop my need for God. All of this knowledge added up doesn't compare to what I can receive from God by simply asking Him: "How do you want us to be faithful shepherds to your flock?"
When Jesus was telling his disciples all these things about him having to leave the world, they couldn't understand at first. He said that none of them even asked about it at first (John 16:5), but later they wanted to ask him (John 16:17-18) when they were all confused. And when they finally asked, Jesus didn't add anything more to what he had already been saying, but somehow he opened them up to finally understand Him and believe. What a miracle! Jesus didn't change anything on the outside after they asked, he only changed them from within. Prayer really does open our eyes to see His work, even though the external circumstances appear the same.
Jesus says, we can DIRECTLY ask God, without Jesus having to ask the Father for us. "In that day you will ask in my name. I am not saying that I will ask the Father on your behalf. No, the Father himself loves you because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God" (John 16:26-27). We can boldly and confidently come before God the Father himself because we know how the Father really feels about us. He isn't full of wrath towards us anymore, but because of Jesus His love is so ready to give what we ask in Jesus name to bring glory to Himself! (John 15:8).
But remember this before asking our Abba: God loves us because we love Jesus and loving Jesus means obeying His commands (John 14:21,23). We remain in God's love when we obey Him (John 15:10). So we can only ask and expect to receive when we obey His commands (John 15:7). And when we obey God and receive from Him what we ask, we'll experience joy that no one can take away (John 15:11, 16:22, 24). "Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive and your joy will be complete." So on a scale of 1-10 on our life satisfaction levels, we should ALL be at a "Cheng-10" and beyond because the joy Jesus gives us is beyond the temporary happiness this world gives. No situation in our lives should ever be too much to take that joy away. Can we reflect that joy in our lives? We do when we stop complaining and thank God for everything that's right, and the only thing right is in Jesus Christ.
Last note: We always end our prayers with "In Jesus name I pray. Amen." When David and I first started praying together back in the college days, I would just end my prayers with a straight cut-to-the-chase "Amen." David taught me to add "In Jesus' name I pray" before saying "Amen." I had no idea why back then and was like "sure okay.....(those Christians)." Now we say this all the time that it becomes so automatic. But this part should be the climax of our prayer because Jesus is "the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through [Him]" (John 14:6). We need to remember that it's only possible for us to talk to God face-to-face because Jesus made the way. He IS the way. Oh how I wish we didn't have the "nose-goes" attitude to talk to God directly. Let us remember that when we pray - Jesus made it possible to speak directly to God and hear directly from God Himself. That was unheard of, until Jesus came.
So in the name of Jesus, to the glory of God, what will you ask Him today???
I believe God wonders the same question for us all the time. "Why don't you just ask me?" When I don't ask God, it's because I don't believe I will receive from Him, not because I think I'm bothering Him like my fear of bothering Ellen ayi. Well, sometimes yeah I do feel like I'm bothering Him, if I'm asking for small things that don't seem related to God at all - like, me getting out of bed in the morning. But THANK God that not only He knows us, but he makes all things known to us through His Spirit (John 16:13-15). And one aspect He lets us know about Him is that we can be assured that if we ask Him anything in Jesus' name, he will give to us. Why? Because when we ask from God, we demonstrate how much we really trust Him. I struggle with praying, with communicating with God, and I only ask and seem to pray when I'm already desperate.
For example as a new wife, I am learning how to be a helper to my husband - to help my husband be the man God wants him to be. But I have a dilemma: If I confront him about some things and tell Him to live in Christ, I might put pressure on him to change with higher expectations than can be handled at this point. But if I don't say anything and let things go, I might appear to be supportive or not caring at all. So out of desperation, I asked God: "What do I do?" What a comforter He is. He reminded me that there is a way to be proactive without being controlling and self-righteous. By praying for my husband CONSISTENTLY (keyword), I'm letting God do his thing within him so in the end, God gets all the credit, not me. In the end, I can say that God changed him as He has already changed him so far. What I cannot do, God can. But until now, I didn't ask God about this matter at all! So before I can pray for David to truly trust in God, I need to trust God myself.
Far much more than mass murder, the world's greatest sin is refusing to believe in Jesus (John 16:8-9), and our only righteousness is by faith in Jesus. Romans 1:17: "For in the gospel a righteousness in God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: 'The righteous will live by faith.'" Our faith is changing all the time, it's dynamic, so we need to get to the point of always trusting in Jesus. Watch out for self-sufficiency. Lately, I've been getting into reading, especially in regards to youth ministry and spiritual leadership. I have to be careful that by gaining more knowledge in these matters, by gaining knowledge about counseling youth through my grad school, that I don't drop my need for God. All of this knowledge added up doesn't compare to what I can receive from God by simply asking Him: "How do you want us to be faithful shepherds to your flock?"
When Jesus was telling his disciples all these things about him having to leave the world, they couldn't understand at first. He said that none of them even asked about it at first (John 16:5), but later they wanted to ask him (John 16:17-18) when they were all confused. And when they finally asked, Jesus didn't add anything more to what he had already been saying, but somehow he opened them up to finally understand Him and believe. What a miracle! Jesus didn't change anything on the outside after they asked, he only changed them from within. Prayer really does open our eyes to see His work, even though the external circumstances appear the same.
Jesus says, we can DIRECTLY ask God, without Jesus having to ask the Father for us. "In that day you will ask in my name. I am not saying that I will ask the Father on your behalf. No, the Father himself loves you because you have loved me and have believed that I came from God" (John 16:26-27). We can boldly and confidently come before God the Father himself because we know how the Father really feels about us. He isn't full of wrath towards us anymore, but because of Jesus His love is so ready to give what we ask in Jesus name to bring glory to Himself! (John 15:8).
But remember this before asking our Abba: God loves us because we love Jesus and loving Jesus means obeying His commands (John 14:21,23). We remain in God's love when we obey Him (John 15:10). So we can only ask and expect to receive when we obey His commands (John 15:7). And when we obey God and receive from Him what we ask, we'll experience joy that no one can take away (John 15:11, 16:22, 24). "Until now you have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive and your joy will be complete." So on a scale of 1-10 on our life satisfaction levels, we should ALL be at a "Cheng-10" and beyond because the joy Jesus gives us is beyond the temporary happiness this world gives. No situation in our lives should ever be too much to take that joy away. Can we reflect that joy in our lives? We do when we stop complaining and thank God for everything that's right, and the only thing right is in Jesus Christ.
Last note: We always end our prayers with "In Jesus name I pray. Amen." When David and I first started praying together back in the college days, I would just end my prayers with a straight cut-to-the-chase "Amen." David taught me to add "In Jesus' name I pray" before saying "Amen." I had no idea why back then and was like "sure okay.....(those Christians)." Now we say this all the time that it becomes so automatic. But this part should be the climax of our prayer because Jesus is "the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through [Him]" (John 14:6). We need to remember that it's only possible for us to talk to God face-to-face because Jesus made the way. He IS the way. Oh how I wish we didn't have the "nose-goes" attitude to talk to God directly. Let us remember that when we pray - Jesus made it possible to speak directly to God and hear directly from God Himself. That was unheard of, until Jesus came.
So in the name of Jesus, to the glory of God, what will you ask Him today???
привет russians!
Wow! I was looking at the stats for our blog today, and found out people in Alaska and Russia have viewed our blog! I'm not sure if they have just stumbled upon our page on accident, but let's hope that the blessings that Jesus gives us are being poured out to bless others around the world. It's already encouraging enough that the Thomas folks away from home are reading our blog, but even more encouraging that Acts 1:8 is being fulfilled! "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth..." And also John 14:12: I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even great things than these, because I am going to the Father." WHAT a blessing it is that Jesus has poured out His Spirit on us, that we can affect the world through his life in us and continue his mission on earth! yay yay yay :)
Today I got a fresh new journal. (Side note: One of my top favorite things in the world is writing my first entry in a brand new journal.) I encourage you to try recording down what God speaks to you and use your journal as a "memorial" of his faithfulness. Just like how Joshua had the 12 stones taken out of the Jordan River when God stopped the river from flowing to let the Israelites pass...."to serve as a sign among you. In the future, when your children ask you, 'What do these stones mean?' tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever" (Joshua 4:6-7). We so easily forget the amazing things God does among us and slip into complaining, negative mode. But let's remember God's faithfulness and be excited to share the praise reports when we meet together, any day of the week!
Today I got a fresh new journal. (Side note: One of my top favorite things in the world is writing my first entry in a brand new journal.) I encourage you to try recording down what God speaks to you and use your journal as a "memorial" of his faithfulness. Just like how Joshua had the 12 stones taken out of the Jordan River when God stopped the river from flowing to let the Israelites pass...."to serve as a sign among you. In the future, when your children ask you, 'What do these stones mean?' tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever" (Joshua 4:6-7). We so easily forget the amazing things God does among us and slip into complaining, negative mode. But let's remember God's faithfulness and be excited to share the praise reports when we meet together, any day of the week!
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Annoyed.
"As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one that this, that he lay down his life for his friends...This is my command: Love each other." -John 15:9-13, 17
As Christ-followers, one of the most explicit commands we have from Jesus is to "love each other". To HIS standard - as he's loved us. We hear this so much that it becomes like one of those things we brush off as "yeah yeah we know." When it comes to doing God's will, we often struggle with wanting to know what this mysterious will is. We ask, "God, what is your will for my major? What is your will for my college? What is your will for my grad school? What is your will for my career? For my marriage?" Rarely does our God make these answers clear right away, but there is a command he's very clear about. LOVE EACH OTHER.
When you picture Christians loving each other, you get a picture of happy Christians being nice to each other at church, at meetings, hugs, smiles, and handshakes. It's even easier for the "nice" people. I've always been a "nice" person. This isn't me bragging, in fact it is something I'm ashamed of. Jesus wasn't just a nice person - he called the Pharisees "You snakes! You brood of vipers!" (Matthew 23:33). I would've left the name-calling out. First thing Jesus did when he entered the temple in Jerusalem was overturn the tables of the money changers and the benches of the dove-sellers. Reminds me of an episode of Love and Hip Hop: Atlanta when my girl K. Michelle gets in a fight with Karlie, and Karlie starts shaking the table. Or in Real Housewives of New Jersey, when Teresa flips the table at a classy family dinner. Those reality show ladies are def not nice. But Jesus was more interested in being passionate about His Father rather than just being agreeable with everyone.
So for "nice people" like me it seems that the command to love each other is easier than for people with a hot-temper. It's not. Because loving each other isn't about being nice to people, it's "laying down your life" for people in order to bring them closer to Christ. We hold to Christ's standard and we will be judged by Christ's standard (Acts17:31). Pastor Yu reminded us at the retreat that on judgment day, the fire will test all our labor and God will shake all things. Anything in our lives that is not Christ will not last. Only Christ will last. The only kind of love God will accept is the love that found its source in Christ and poured out to others.
Right after this passage, God talks about the world hating us because Jesus chose us out of the world and hated him first. Right after he commands us to love each other, he says the world will hate us. So what I don't understand is this: How are we expected to love a world that hates us and hates Jesus, when we can't even love his church, our family of brothers and sisters???
Yes, in church God COMMANDS us to love people we don't like. I've had and still have my moments where I don't like a brother/sister in Christ because of something they've done. I've let it grow to bitterness/passive-aggressiveness. But I need God to keep me in check to help me keep my thoughts in obedience to Christ. Even if we know we don't like somebody, but keep it to ourselves and don't express it, we need to watch out! Watch out if you think, "Yeah I have my opinion about him/her, but I'm not gonna tell it to their face so it's all good and it won't do damage." James 1:14-15 says, "..each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown gives birth to death."
It sucks to see within our own church that we just "tolerate with each other." Who are the people that you don't get along with? That you find annoying? That you've had the urge to punch in the face? Will you just settle for having your unexpressed opinions about them, but not necessarily to their face? Will you settle for being civil with them when you see them at church, but then vent to other people who will understand your frustrations? If someone is venting to you and joking about this person behind their back, will you settle for joining in the jokes, convincing yourself that it's nothing serious but just for fun? Does this person trigger you because of their sin against God and harm to his church, or because you just don't like their personality? And if the reason is really about sin, are YOU doing anything as their sister/brother in Christ to "restore him/her gently" (Galatians 6:1)?
Jesus calls us to MORE than just that. But we find ourselves saying, "Well that's just my opinion. Can't I just be real about this person? That's just how I feel. Why can't I just do me." The reason why we can't just DO ME anymore is because we are DEAD. All of that has been crucified. To really LIVE OUT CHRIST by his new-life power is to deny your own personal opinions/preferences/feelings about this person and replace that with how Jesus feels about this person. How did Jesus feel about the woman caught in adultery? He said "Then neither do I condemn you...Go now and leave your life of sin." When the other sinful woman wiped Jesus feet with her tears and hair, and everyone else was judging her, Jesus said, "Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven - for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little" (Luke 7:47).
So if we want to be serious about loving Jesus, which is basically obeying his commands, and his explicit command is to LOVE EACH OTHER, then let's start with remembering how much, the long uncountable list of sins that gets longer each day, that Jesus forgave us for. We always need to look back at ourselves. If we are finding it hard to love someone, see it as an area where we still need to lay hold of Christ's victory. WE don't need to TRY to love that person, WE need to deny ourselves and let Christ LIVE in us instead. Let's celebrate NOW because Christ's has already won that victory for us, and by partying it up with Jesus we'll show that we believe He already has. Then watch how He'll change us from within.
Let's keep each other accountable for the way we love each other, starting within our own church. Stop with the "just for fun" jokes, stop with the gossiping, stop with the venting. We are talking about God's redeemed children here. Keep this between you and God, unless you are really trying to let this be an area where Christ will take over and need encouragement and prayer from your brothers/sisters. Unless we get past this first step, we can't be expected to lay down our lives for our family in Christ. And unless we give sacrificial love to our own family in Christ, we can't be expected to love a world that hates us.
As Christ-followers, one of the most explicit commands we have from Jesus is to "love each other". To HIS standard - as he's loved us. We hear this so much that it becomes like one of those things we brush off as "yeah yeah we know." When it comes to doing God's will, we often struggle with wanting to know what this mysterious will is. We ask, "God, what is your will for my major? What is your will for my college? What is your will for my grad school? What is your will for my career? For my marriage?" Rarely does our God make these answers clear right away, but there is a command he's very clear about. LOVE EACH OTHER.
When you picture Christians loving each other, you get a picture of happy Christians being nice to each other at church, at meetings, hugs, smiles, and handshakes. It's even easier for the "nice" people. I've always been a "nice" person. This isn't me bragging, in fact it is something I'm ashamed of. Jesus wasn't just a nice person - he called the Pharisees "You snakes! You brood of vipers!" (Matthew 23:33). I would've left the name-calling out. First thing Jesus did when he entered the temple in Jerusalem was overturn the tables of the money changers and the benches of the dove-sellers. Reminds me of an episode of Love and Hip Hop: Atlanta when my girl K. Michelle gets in a fight with Karlie, and Karlie starts shaking the table. Or in Real Housewives of New Jersey, when Teresa flips the table at a classy family dinner. Those reality show ladies are def not nice. But Jesus was more interested in being passionate about His Father rather than just being agreeable with everyone.
So for "nice people" like me it seems that the command to love each other is easier than for people with a hot-temper. It's not. Because loving each other isn't about being nice to people, it's "laying down your life" for people in order to bring them closer to Christ. We hold to Christ's standard and we will be judged by Christ's standard (Acts17:31). Pastor Yu reminded us at the retreat that on judgment day, the fire will test all our labor and God will shake all things. Anything in our lives that is not Christ will not last. Only Christ will last. The only kind of love God will accept is the love that found its source in Christ and poured out to others.
Right after this passage, God talks about the world hating us because Jesus chose us out of the world and hated him first. Right after he commands us to love each other, he says the world will hate us. So what I don't understand is this: How are we expected to love a world that hates us and hates Jesus, when we can't even love his church, our family of brothers and sisters???
Yes, in church God COMMANDS us to love people we don't like. I've had and still have my moments where I don't like a brother/sister in Christ because of something they've done. I've let it grow to bitterness/passive-aggressiveness. But I need God to keep me in check to help me keep my thoughts in obedience to Christ. Even if we know we don't like somebody, but keep it to ourselves and don't express it, we need to watch out! Watch out if you think, "Yeah I have my opinion about him/her, but I'm not gonna tell it to their face so it's all good and it won't do damage." James 1:14-15 says, "..each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown gives birth to death."
It sucks to see within our own church that we just "tolerate with each other." Who are the people that you don't get along with? That you find annoying? That you've had the urge to punch in the face? Will you just settle for having your unexpressed opinions about them, but not necessarily to their face? Will you settle for being civil with them when you see them at church, but then vent to other people who will understand your frustrations? If someone is venting to you and joking about this person behind their back, will you settle for joining in the jokes, convincing yourself that it's nothing serious but just for fun? Does this person trigger you because of their sin against God and harm to his church, or because you just don't like their personality? And if the reason is really about sin, are YOU doing anything as their sister/brother in Christ to "restore him/her gently" (Galatians 6:1)?
Jesus calls us to MORE than just that. But we find ourselves saying, "Well that's just my opinion. Can't I just be real about this person? That's just how I feel. Why can't I just do me." The reason why we can't just DO ME anymore is because we are DEAD. All of that has been crucified. To really LIVE OUT CHRIST by his new-life power is to deny your own personal opinions/preferences/feelings about this person and replace that with how Jesus feels about this person. How did Jesus feel about the woman caught in adultery? He said "Then neither do I condemn you...Go now and leave your life of sin." When the other sinful woman wiped Jesus feet with her tears and hair, and everyone else was judging her, Jesus said, "Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven - for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little" (Luke 7:47).
So if we want to be serious about loving Jesus, which is basically obeying his commands, and his explicit command is to LOVE EACH OTHER, then let's start with remembering how much, the long uncountable list of sins that gets longer each day, that Jesus forgave us for. We always need to look back at ourselves. If we are finding it hard to love someone, see it as an area where we still need to lay hold of Christ's victory. WE don't need to TRY to love that person, WE need to deny ourselves and let Christ LIVE in us instead. Let's celebrate NOW because Christ's has already won that victory for us, and by partying it up with Jesus we'll show that we believe He already has. Then watch how He'll change us from within.
Let's keep each other accountable for the way we love each other, starting within our own church. Stop with the "just for fun" jokes, stop with the gossiping, stop with the venting. We are talking about God's redeemed children here. Keep this between you and God, unless you are really trying to let this be an area where Christ will take over and need encouragement and prayer from your brothers/sisters. Unless we get past this first step, we can't be expected to lay down our lives for our family in Christ. And unless we give sacrificial love to our own family in Christ, we can't be expected to love a world that hates us.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Christianese: "May you be glorified"
We should make a dictionary of all the Christianese terms we use. I probably don't have time to finish this post since I have to be outta here in 5 minutes, but today God had me reflect on what "bringing Him glory" REALLY meant.
So many times we pray, "God may you be glorified through this....I pray that I can give you glory....may we give you glory through our worship...Take all the glory during our retreat..."
But what does that look like? If you were to break it down to a non-churched person what giving God the glory was about, what would you say?
We never use the term glory in our everyday conversations with people - "May you be glorified through your championship meet later pal!" "Girllll you look super glorious today!"
So I wanna hear from you: How would we know if our prayer of "God may you be glorified" was fulfilled? What would be different?
So many times we pray, "God may you be glorified through this....I pray that I can give you glory....may we give you glory through our worship...Take all the glory during our retreat..."
But what does that look like? If you were to break it down to a non-churched person what giving God the glory was about, what would you say?
We never use the term glory in our everyday conversations with people - "May you be glorified through your championship meet later pal!" "Girllll you look super glorious today!"
So I wanna hear from you: How would we know if our prayer of "God may you be glorified" was fulfilled? What would be different?
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Back on track in the back of my 'lac
(see the wayyyy bottom of this post to cop this album!)
Wuddup blogworld! It's been a while since I've been here, but lately I've been feeling like God's been wanting me to share what He's put on my heart. I want to thank Him for the way He's been waking me up in the mornings before the sun's out to spend unhurried time with Him. Even though I am NOT a morning person, never HAVE been, and didn't think I ever WOULD be, it just shows i'm not waking up by my own willpower, right? Especially now that I have a cuddlebear husband now. In fact, I fall asleep in the middle of praying to Him often. But He just put this desire in me that WANTS me to get up and be with Him...thank you God, it has been so worth it.
At first it wasn't easy. Not the waking up part, the things that God would call me out on. First of all, i HATE constructive criticism. Even when people say it's supposed to help, it just makes me want to punch you in the face. I don't need you telling me how to run things (old self talk). But to have God call you out is another thing. Things like my lack of integrity - how i don't follow up with what i say, my lies to get out of trouble, how my words and actions aren't consistent....My self-righteousness - how i get prideful about my spiritual highs, feel holier than everyone else, put on a spiritual front on the outside like I'm all kinds of put together....and most recently, my selfishness - how I care only about my life, my career, my school, my goals, myself me me me, to the point where the ministry God called me to has shown deterioration.
I'm not trying to be hard on myself, but God is calling me to grow...or should I say shrink. Less of me, and more of Christ. God is calling Christ in me to reveal His glory. Today, God showed an aspect of what it means for Christ to be our very life. Not a part of it, not just on 3131 Bowers, not just when we pray, not just when we have our Wed night meetings. But Christ is all and in all fa sho! When Jesus says, "I am the life", it's not just one of those things we respond to and say, "That's nice Jesus. Thanks for the reminder. And then?" When Jesus says he is our life, HE is the one who directs this physical body, from our thoughts to our actions. I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. -Galatians 2:20
Every day holds moments for the light of Christ to shine within us, no matter what we're doing. It's not about close we feel to Him, or being conscious of Him every moment, or even seeing how God is working in our external circumstances. Those are rare moments when we recognize how God is working in life's circumstances. But just as Jesus was in the Father, and the Father was in Him, we have the potential of that same relationship as well. Don’t you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. -John 14:10-11
Jesus is in us, and we are in Him. For Christ to be our life is Christ, "living in me, who is doing his work". We often wait passively for Jesus to do his thing. We look for Jesus in everywhere but ourselves. We wait for a huge revival in our youth group. We expect that one day, we'll have that moment of a holy experience with God that suddenly changes us. I'm sure some of us are waiting for the retreat this weekend to happen to see Jesus. But Jesus is already in us, so what are we waiting for? Let HIM live your life - it belongs to Him. Let HIM use your life to do what HE needs to do at this point of history in this particular location with the specific people he's put in your lives. We can fool ourselves thinking we have faith and we are waiting for something glorious to happen to us, but we don't let Christ's life be ACTIVE in us. Not that God doesn't have big things planned in our futures, he totally does. But our trust in Him isn't just for the long-term, it's in every moment. Sounds abstract, doesn't it? God's been using the youth ministry lately to show me what this means...
You may or may not have heard there have been some individual cases exposed in the youth group where our kids be doin what they aint supposed to be doin. Imma be real and say that even among our own Thomas group we may have these cases too. Hearing about these have been very discouraging, have made me feel like a failure to this "flock", even made me think condemning thoughts towards these people: "You're doing the worst thing possible", "You grew up in this church...you should know better...what are you thinking..." Then I try to think of all the strategies, plans, changes that need to be made for our group.
But God's timing could never be better in giving me time to reflect on His Word and receive Him. The more I receive His word, the more the life of Christ becomes active and I see how he changes me to see things....Oswald Chambers had a quote the other day that went "God has established things so that prayer, on the basis of redemption, changes the way a person looks at things. Prayer is not a matter of changing things externally, but one of working miracles in a person’s inner nature."
I was in the word in John 11 today, how Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. Jesus saw Lazarus' sickness as something that would be an opportunity for God's glory. In fact, even though he got the message when Lazarus was still alive, he waited until Lazarus DIED until he came to Mary and Martha. So by the time Mary and Martha saw Jesus, they were like "If only you were here, my brother would not have died." In the back of my mind I imagined them thinking "Thanks A LOT Jesus for your delay. What took you so long??" But of course Jesus assured them that He is the RESURRECTION and the LIFE. He wanted everyone to believe Him when they would see his glorious power of raising Lazarus from the dead. He could have just healed Lazarus and prevented him from dying. But He was even more glorious through giving Lazarus life after dying!
God is helping me see that these weaknesses, problems, limitations in the youth ministry are not an end in itself, like Lazarus' death. They are opportunities to trust Him and see his glorious power! Yes, what I can see is apathy and indifference, dead worship sessions, and silence during communion. But what I see is not the reality of Christ. The reality is that Christ is the life-giver and when He is my life, I can only be confident in Him. When Christ is my life, HIS mercy and compassion goes out to those who stumble in our youth group. When Christ is my life, I don't need to rely on myself and my "youth expertise" to come up with strategies, plans, and changes. I rely on Him. He sees beyond what I can see. When Christ is my life, there is no fear of looking like a failure before others. When Christ is my life, I don't decide my agenda for the day, He does. When Christ is my life, I don't speak out of my own stuttering simple words, He gives me the words to speak. When Christ is my life, I don't see my holiness, I see my own sin not everyone else's and the only righteousness in me in Christ. When Christ is my life, the answer is not more helpers in the youth ministry, an English pastor, or even more passion. These may all be helpful, but these will all fade. The answer is in Christ alone! And it starts with realizing the life in Christ in myself, not even in relation to the youth ministry. Just Him in me and me in Him. And when the life of Christ overflows like "rivers of living water" (John 7:38) in me, and in you, and in His church, then we can finally see Jesus in all his glory. What are we waiting for???
Wow this was ridiculously long...I need to start updating this more often so I don't make a blog dump again!
***For all you hip hop fans, Jin has a new album out called "Crazy love ridiculous faith". He was reppin Asians on 106 n park back in the day, used to rap about crazy worldly stuff, then got saved, and now He's reppin Christ in his flows! This album is off the chainzzzzz
http://www.rapzilla.com/rz/music/freemp3s/4959-mc-jin-crazy-love-ridiculous-faith
Monday, August 6, 2012
Christ is the REALITY
Colossians 2:17
Before Melissa moved out to live with a boy, I felt like God was putting it on my heart to look for a non-Christian roommate. Part of it was because I felt like the next step of my spiritual life is to be challenged in sharing the gospel with the people around me. I've felt like this for a long time, however, I never had the boldness to actually do it with someone who isn't part of my family. I found our Venus on craigslist and she seemed like a nice and quiet girl. She was also down when I told her we had Bible studies at our house on occasion.
So Venus has been living at our house for a month now. So far, I've only attempted to reach out to her twice. The first time was when I had a BBQ reunion with some friends from Intervarsity at my community pool. I asked her to come and I reminded myself to give her a disclaimer that we're all Christian. I also wanted to tell her that we were going to say grace for the meal but if she felt uncomfortable, then she doesn't have to do it. The truth was that I was EXTREMELY UNCOMFORTABLE with her feeling out place with my friends. During the reunion, I was about to give her a heads up when my friend Grace suddenly asked me to bless the food. I was so nervous because I didn't want Venus to feel uncomfortable. But I did it anyway. After reflecting on that moment, I was convicted and rebuked by Jesus. I was reminded of this verse:
"For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek." Romans 1:16
Silly me... to think that Venus would be offended by my actions to glorify God. I lived in fear because I didn't believe that the power of the gospel. God isn't some one to be ashamed of. We are blessed because the reality is that we know Him and we belong to a loving, gracious, sovereign KING!
Monday, May 7, 2012
Be the Change You Hope to See
Mann it's the second week of finals and all I gotta say is God is good! I don't know how I'm doing on the finals (in fact i'm pretty sure i'm doing really poorly) but despite all that I just feel this inexplainable and slightly illogical peace with everything. The other day I was standing outside the library stressing when this dude from my class comes up and asked if he could pray for me! How awesome is that?! Little things like that just keep reassuring me that God is looking out for me, that He holds my future in His hands, and I got nothing to worry about. I just need to learn to be faithful with the opportunities He's given me and seek every opportunity to bring glory to Him.
This past Friday at CLF, Melissa's friend Harrie (or however you spell it) came and shared to the youth about the importance of knowing God for yourself. Afterwards, she stressed this to the counselors, telling us that if we can't expect to shove fire and passion for God down the youths' throats if we're not displaying it ourselves. Fire is contagious, but it needs to start with us. Will spoke on a similar topic this past Sunday, and he asked us to pray that his fire would be reignited so that it could be passed to us, so definitely keep him in your prayers. At the same time, we shouldn't wait for him to get reignited in order to get our fire started. We need to be praying for ourselves and for each other that the passion will burn and catch on, and that has to start with a daily walk and personal relationship with Jesus. That means keeping up with devotions, not just to cross it off your list but actually enjoying your time with the Lord. That means coming on Sundays EXPECTING to pray. That means sitting with the youth and encouraging them to express their praises to our Lord. That means getting off our spiritual butts! Man I wish I wasn't leaving for the summer because I know God's going to be doing some amazing work in the English Ministry this summer and I wish I were going to be here to see it. Nevertheless I can't wait to hear the praise reports from across the Pacific about how the Spirit is leading and guiding this group. But it has to start with us!
Lastly, Will asked us in the sermon what our purpose in life was; what is the one thing you are living for that you are also willing to die for? I gotta be honest, when I first decided to attend law school my purpose was so that I could use the law to help people and bring glory to God. But in just the one year I've been in here, my focus as all been on getting job interviews, getting a job at a firm, getting good work experience, yadda yadda. I used to dream about having my own practice and being able to help those who needed it most (like Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, and get paid in a sack of potatoes or something), but recently all my dreams are about what area I want to practice, and where I'm going to work after law school, and in how many years do I want to make partner and pay off my loans. Somewhere along the line, this blessing from God of getting into law school and using it as a vehicle to serve Him as become so discombobulated that now it's all about me and my glory and my future and aspirations. God wants us to have plans and goals, but ultimately He needs to be the center of what we do, not ourselves. Please pray for me that God will realign my will with His and I would submit to His more perfect plan for my life. Thanks :)
This past Friday at CLF, Melissa's friend Harrie (or however you spell it) came and shared to the youth about the importance of knowing God for yourself. Afterwards, she stressed this to the counselors, telling us that if we can't expect to shove fire and passion for God down the youths' throats if we're not displaying it ourselves. Fire is contagious, but it needs to start with us. Will spoke on a similar topic this past Sunday, and he asked us to pray that his fire would be reignited so that it could be passed to us, so definitely keep him in your prayers. At the same time, we shouldn't wait for him to get reignited in order to get our fire started. We need to be praying for ourselves and for each other that the passion will burn and catch on, and that has to start with a daily walk and personal relationship with Jesus. That means keeping up with devotions, not just to cross it off your list but actually enjoying your time with the Lord. That means coming on Sundays EXPECTING to pray. That means sitting with the youth and encouraging them to express their praises to our Lord. That means getting off our spiritual butts! Man I wish I wasn't leaving for the summer because I know God's going to be doing some amazing work in the English Ministry this summer and I wish I were going to be here to see it. Nevertheless I can't wait to hear the praise reports from across the Pacific about how the Spirit is leading and guiding this group. But it has to start with us!
Lastly, Will asked us in the sermon what our purpose in life was; what is the one thing you are living for that you are also willing to die for? I gotta be honest, when I first decided to attend law school my purpose was so that I could use the law to help people and bring glory to God. But in just the one year I've been in here, my focus as all been on getting job interviews, getting a job at a firm, getting good work experience, yadda yadda. I used to dream about having my own practice and being able to help those who needed it most (like Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, and get paid in a sack of potatoes or something), but recently all my dreams are about what area I want to practice, and where I'm going to work after law school, and in how many years do I want to make partner and pay off my loans. Somewhere along the line, this blessing from God of getting into law school and using it as a vehicle to serve Him as become so discombobulated that now it's all about me and my glory and my future and aspirations. God wants us to have plans and goals, but ultimately He needs to be the center of what we do, not ourselves. Please pray for me that God will realign my will with His and I would submit to His more perfect plan for my life. Thanks :)
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Prayer Request
Aaron - finals week is beginning next week; worried and stressed out. Be diligent where God has called him.
Kathy - lots of things coming up: work, pcat, pharmacy school apps; body image
David - didn't pray. Shame on you. Struggling with quiet times with God. Skipping devotionals have created a disconnect from God. Praise God for job interview!! Be sensitive to where God is leading him.
Melissa - feeling inadequate in her position. Never been a leader, she has always been a cooperator. Doesn't know if she's being faithful to His calling. Shes more concerned with the ministry rather than being connected with God.
Jaclyn - good retreat; final presentation next week
Arthur - being a light at work. Prayer during meal time - not being in such a rush all the time. Working on Bible reading.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Prayer Requests
Jaclyn- continue to be committed to doing Bible study with Rachel every night. It's good to be a lonely woman :) rainbow retreat this weekend.
Kathy- passion for God is there but the discipline is not. Pray for discipline and passion to come together.
Arthur- pray that he'll start reading the Bible and let his coworkers know he's a Christian.
Melissa- no time for Jesus since she has been back. Pray for friends and to be bold to share the gospel. Seek after God first.
David- work has been hard. Looking for another job. Direct disobedience towards God.
Aaron- very very burnt out. Too many roles and not getting fed enough. Pray for solid devotional life.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Thursday, March 22, 2012
HalleYOOLAH!
At that time Jesus prayed this prayer: "O Father, Lord of heaven and earth, thank you for hiding these things from those who think themselves wise and clever, and for revealing them to the childlike. Yes, Father, it pleased you to do it this way!" -Matthew 11:25-26
Don't you miss being a kid? When life was about playing Polly Pockets, talking to your stuffed animals, not feeling bad about eating cookies, and singing Disney songs while dancing around the house in your onesie? Now we gotta worry about how we'll pay our tuition, rent, and find a career. We gain more life-experience so we don't need our parents to take care of us anymore and be what Ne-Yo wants us to be - Miss Indepennnnndent, that's why I love herrr...
But the more experience we gain, the more responsibilities we take on for ourselves and eventually for our own family and sooner than later it's a big ol' burden on our shoulders. What a relief that our Savior says: "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light." -Matthew 11:28-30
What is your burden right now? What's heavy on your heart? What are you having doubts about?
Are you trying to lighten the load by figuring things out on your own? Doing more? Trying harder?
Right now my heavy burden comes from tryna make everyone happy. Don't offend people. Don't make this person mad at you. Be everyone's friend. Saying "no" will make them mad at you. It's my responsibility to do and be what everyone else wants. In my ministry, this looks like taking on more tasks, reading more books, gaining more experience so I'll stop being inadequate and know all there is to know about youth ministry. There's nothing wrong with gaining experience and life skills, but it becomes a problem when we become TOO independent and stop depending on our Lord, our Father.
We are still his children, but at this stage in our lives we are pressured to grow-up FAST. Then we think we "got it" when we don't. We act like we don't need Him, but we do. And this is what I love about kids and young people: They know they still need someone to care for them. Yeah, teenagers act like they know it all but in reality they know they are useless and can't really live without their parents still.
At my old job, I used to work with this little boy I'll call EP (his initials). EP used to hate showering and getting ready for bed. But I worked with him long enough to the point where he trusted me as someone who cared for him. Then it would start getting easier to get him to shower and get ready for bed by having him do random things. To him, it was random, but to me, I had a plan. I would use his Yoda to talk to him in a "Yoda voice" and say things like "Shower, You must." And he would shower! And then I'd sing him a song about brushing his teeth using a T-rex puppet, and he would brush his teeth while singing the song! But he knew he needed help and had someone who cared for him enough that he trusted me enough to do the random things I told him to.
So remember that you don't have to have it all together, all the answers, everything under control, and all the life experience. As long as you remember you'll never be too grown to be independent from God the Father, you're right where you need to be. Trust him not only with the big life decisions, but EVERYTHING. As soon as something troubles you, who do you turn to? Yourself, your boyfriend, girlfriend, bestie, google, yo mama, or your ABBA FATHER? No wonder why Jesus said his yoke is easy and his burden is light. We are never alone - we know God our Father loves as his children, Jesus walks with us understanding every aspect of our human life, and the Holy Spirit is our counselor.
So enjoy the videos below and understand why God reveals His truth to the childlike and says the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like children! HalleYOOOLAH!
You have to hear this girl in the beginning and her prayer at the end. Okay I cried a little.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Love costs ERRTHANG
"And all nations will hate you because you are my followers. But everyone who endures to the end will be saved...
Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell.
If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it." -Matthew 10:22, 38-39
Watching that video above made me feel so small about my faith. It makes me feel embarrassed to share my prayer requests around my work, my school, and my wedding. Not that we shouldn't trust God with these things in our lives, but it just shows our real main concerns going on right now. For the God who lived an extreme life for me on earth, it doesn't make sense for me to live a mediocre life to God.
This all came from reading Matthew 10. I was just ALL confused after reading this passage. I questioned:
1.) Why did Jesus give the disciples authority to cast out evil spirits and heal every kind of disease and illness RIGHT after he called them? What happened to their training?
2.) Why is this not normal for us who call ourselves Christians aka Christ-followers to do these kinds of things today? Is this even possible for us or are we just lacking faith?
4.) Was this warning about persecution only for them or for us too? Because I aint worried about being whipped for my faith anytime soon...
It just seemed like one of those Bible passages that only applied back in the day...but not for us today. And I had no answers, but God did prompt me to confess some things: missing opportunities to acknowledge Jesus before some people so I wouldn't look like a "Jesus freak", allowing myself to dwell on impure thoughts for my own enjoyment, refusing to forgive because I feel like i deserve an apology, seeking for myself to be noticed and acknowledged in front of others, etc...the list goes on and on...but the common denominator to all that is ME wanting to live MY life and do thangs MY way.
YOLO is the motto right? I mean, we're only young once. We aint getting younger so don't we have the right to live a little? These thoughts still go through my mind sometimes, missing the good ol' days before I got saved and started feeling convicted about sin. But when I got saved, "making the most out of college" took on a whole different meaning. Life went to endless freedom from parents/restrictions to living for Christ ONLY.
To this day, I still struggle with DEVOTION to him. I see how far these persecuted Christians across the world go to the point of being killed for expressing their faith in our Lord. How far are we willing to go for Him? Once someone called me "a little extreme" when I was expressing my faith in Jesus. That alone made me feel like a loser.
I guess what I'm tryna say is we gotta stop every once in a while and assess who we really living for. It's like the seesaw effect - we can only have one higher than the other. If we let ourselves take the higher place, then we are less devoted to Christ, and if Christ is at the highest place which he should be at, then we're at the bottom - giving up "life's privileges" (which have no comparison with the "divine privileges" (phil 2:7) Christ gave up.)
Let's express our devotion to him today by re-focusing on our mission here wherever we're at, whatever time it is. Right before Jesus sent out his disciples he looked out at all those people and had compassion on them and knowing he was only one person, he said: "The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields."
We are the workers now! And we do have the power to do what the disciples did, as long as we trust and believe that Jesus HIMSELF is working and speaking through us. Let's go hard for Him and not have a lukewarm, wimpy faith. We can do more powerful and glorious works for His Kingdom depending on how powerful and glorious we view our King!!!
Let's not give up...the fullness of our reward is coming....everything is for JESUS, no matter the cost! Are we ready to change our prayers from:
"God, help me get good grades and do well in my job. Thank you for this food. Make these kids listen to me. Help me plan a fancy wedding."
-to-
"God, do whatever it takes in my life to bring you the most glory, give me strength to face the upcoming hardships of being your true follower. My cross - BRING IT ON! Jesus ONLY Jesus EVER!"
Don't be afraid of those who want to kill your body; they cannot touch your soul. Fear only God, who can destroy both soul and body in hell.
If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it." -Matthew 10:22, 38-39
Watching that video above made me feel so small about my faith. It makes me feel embarrassed to share my prayer requests around my work, my school, and my wedding. Not that we shouldn't trust God with these things in our lives, but it just shows our real main concerns going on right now. For the God who lived an extreme life for me on earth, it doesn't make sense for me to live a mediocre life to God.
This all came from reading Matthew 10. I was just ALL confused after reading this passage. I questioned:
1.) Why did Jesus give the disciples authority to cast out evil spirits and heal every kind of disease and illness RIGHT after he called them? What happened to their training?
2.) Why is this not normal for us who call ourselves Christians aka Christ-followers to do these kinds of things today? Is this even possible for us or are we just lacking faith?
4.) Was this warning about persecution only for them or for us too? Because I aint worried about being whipped for my faith anytime soon...
It just seemed like one of those Bible passages that only applied back in the day...but not for us today. And I had no answers, but God did prompt me to confess some things: missing opportunities to acknowledge Jesus before some people so I wouldn't look like a "Jesus freak", allowing myself to dwell on impure thoughts for my own enjoyment, refusing to forgive because I feel like i deserve an apology, seeking for myself to be noticed and acknowledged in front of others, etc...the list goes on and on...but the common denominator to all that is ME wanting to live MY life and do thangs MY way.
YOLO is the motto right? I mean, we're only young once. We aint getting younger so don't we have the right to live a little? These thoughts still go through my mind sometimes, missing the good ol' days before I got saved and started feeling convicted about sin. But when I got saved, "making the most out of college" took on a whole different meaning. Life went to endless freedom from parents/restrictions to living for Christ ONLY.
To this day, I still struggle with DEVOTION to him. I see how far these persecuted Christians across the world go to the point of being killed for expressing their faith in our Lord. How far are we willing to go for Him? Once someone called me "a little extreme" when I was expressing my faith in Jesus. That alone made me feel like a loser.
I guess what I'm tryna say is we gotta stop every once in a while and assess who we really living for. It's like the seesaw effect - we can only have one higher than the other. If we let ourselves take the higher place, then we are less devoted to Christ, and if Christ is at the highest place which he should be at, then we're at the bottom - giving up "life's privileges" (which have no comparison with the "divine privileges" (phil 2:7) Christ gave up.)
Let's express our devotion to him today by re-focusing on our mission here wherever we're at, whatever time it is. Right before Jesus sent out his disciples he looked out at all those people and had compassion on them and knowing he was only one person, he said: "The harvest is great, but the workers are few. So pray to the Lord who is in charge of the harvest; ask him to send more workers into his fields."
We are the workers now! And we do have the power to do what the disciples did, as long as we trust and believe that Jesus HIMSELF is working and speaking through us. Let's go hard for Him and not have a lukewarm, wimpy faith. We can do more powerful and glorious works for His Kingdom depending on how powerful and glorious we view our King!!!
Let's not give up...the fullness of our reward is coming....everything is for JESUS, no matter the cost! Are we ready to change our prayers from:
"God, help me get good grades and do well in my job. Thank you for this food. Make these kids listen to me. Help me plan a fancy wedding."
-to-
"God, do whatever it takes in my life to bring you the most glory, give me strength to face the upcoming hardships of being your true follower. My cross - BRING IT ON! Jesus ONLY Jesus EVER!"
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
BALLIN'
My best friend, Melissa, our freshman year.
Basketball has been a huge part of my life since I was in 4th grade. It became more significant in middle school when Melissa (who didn't even like me at first) invited me to play for her church league. Well, what she forgot to mention was that in order to play in the league, I had to go to church. So I sat through Sunday after Sunday for two years, doodling and sketching on my sermon notes and skipping Sunday school to go to Carl's Junior :) Melissa never shared the "gospel" to me in words, but her family lived it out in the way that they treated me - like I was their own daughter. Her dad spent his Saturdays and Sundays driving us to basketball practice and games for 3 years. Her mom did the same, and even invited me to their family gatherings. They were the family that lived out Christ's love and I honestly believe that was the best exposure to the gospel someone can ever have.
I guess sitting through Sunday sermons for 3 years finally worked. I remember Pastor Cory from Evergreen SGV gave a message on the heart of the Father. That morning, he made an alter call (as he did every Sunday), and something was different. I felt the Holy Spirit prompting me to raise my hand because deep down inside, I really wanted to be loved by God. So I accepted Christ that day, without really understanding what that meant for my life. I thought being a Christian meant that I had to accept Jesus into my heart and then go to church every Sunday. I had this misconception for a few years until I went to college and recommitted my life (forreal this time!) to Jesus based on a similar message at Intervarsity.
I met with Jojo on Monday night and I asked her what her favorite part about SG was. She said that she really liked our groups "Culture Shock", where I give the group the background/ context of the passage. She said that when she's trying to tell her friends about Jesus, the first thing she wants to be able to share with them is WHY the Bible is true and all the facts about it. My weakness was that I didn't know the fundamental truths about God when I first accepted Christ. I love that SVCA is so focused on Bible truths - because God's Word is infallible and it breathes life into us. SVCA youth know that God is the ultimate Creator of the universe, the Author of Salvation and He is this HUGE God! But this is just ONE out of many aspects of who He is. He is also the Heavenly Daddy, the Father who cares for us so deeply that He knows EVERY SINGLE HAIR ON OUR HEADS. Psalms 139 tells us that He thought of us, not just when we were born, but from the very beginning of time. He had already imagined EVERYTHING about us!
So thanks Melissa, and the Gotos for showing me Christ's love through the way they loved me! :D
Evan-ge-Love
To be perfectly honest, I was kind of dreading writing this post when I saw David send out the email asking us to share our evangelism experiences. I feel like a major hypocrite telling the youth to be bold and share their faith with their friends when I do it so rarely myself.
I must admit I haven't been very faithful in carrying out the Great Commission since high school. Most of the time, when Jesus comes up in a conversation with my friends I just try to make Christianity not "seem so bad," or I try not to offend anyone. But I've been realizing lately that this is such a loser mentality. Am I really going to let my friends that I care so much about face eternal judgement and damnation just because I'm afraid of offending them or they'll think I'm weird? I know this is a common fear that many people struggle with, but one I really hope we can overcome together as a fellowship.
I was definitely a lot better about sharing the gospel when I was younger. My first time was with Felix in 5th grade on the field of John Muir Elementary during lunch. The second time was with my good friend Johnson* (name changed), during freshmen year of high school. I was studying with him in the library at Lynbrook after school when I brought up this cool post about the Professor & the Student (http://www.godandscience.org/apologetics/professor.html) that I had recently read. Knowing that Johnson was a thinker, I attempted to demonstrate how God really did exist and tried sharing with him from my own meager personal experiences. Johnson was intrigued, and promised to come with me to church. He did, for the next several weeks, and about a month later at a youth outreach he gave his life to Christ.
Here's where I failed. Johnson came to our church for almost a full year while we still met at De Anza college. Then he stopped coming. It started off as just one Sunday, and then a few more, until every time I asked him about it at school he always had some excuse not to come. Rather than following up or praying for him, I let him be. I had other things, bigger things, more important things on my mind, things that right now I don't even remember. Johnson told me at the end of sophomore year that he just didn't believe anymore, that he hadn't experienced God for himself and science had too many good answers. He said he need "time to explore" and to find answers to his questions. He asked me to respect his decision, and I did. I never invited him to church again.
Johnson and I grew apart after we both went to college. He attended UCLA, where he joined a frat, pierced his ears, joined a dance team, and started wearing designer jeans. Today, he works in LA and plans on applying to Harvard or UPenn business school, and has the GPA and GRE score to back it up. Unfortunately, I don't think he's stepped foot since the last time he was at ours in high school.
Upon reflecting, I realized that my greatest failure through this whole experience was that I lacked compassion and love. There were so many times that I could have prayed with Johnson, encouraged him, read the Bible with him, or directed him towards those with more experience. Instead, I left him to swim on his own thinking that he'd figure it out when he was ready, and in the end, his faith couldn't withstand the waves of doubt that overcame his fledgling Christian life. I understand that this isn't all my fault, and that perhaps no matter how hard I tried Johnson was going to become an atheist anyway. But the point is, I didn't try, mostly because I didn't care enough to try.
This week we've challenged the youth to each think of one friend that is unsaved and to start praying for them everyday. I've already missed 3 days, and it's gotten me thinking: "how much do you love your friends?" Do I really love them enough to want to see them in eternity? Or do I just kind of care, sometimes, when I can remember? I think the takeaway from all this that evangelism must be born out of love, otherwise it's just going to be a task we do, a check mark on our list, a scoresheet we bring to heaven and say, "Look God, I did it this many times!" And that's really what Jesus tells us to do. Love your neighbor. Love your friends, and those people He put in your life. Love 'em enough to share the gospel.
Sorry I know this is super long, if you made it this far, I really do love you.
I must admit I haven't been very faithful in carrying out the Great Commission since high school. Most of the time, when Jesus comes up in a conversation with my friends I just try to make Christianity not "seem so bad," or I try not to offend anyone. But I've been realizing lately that this is such a loser mentality. Am I really going to let my friends that I care so much about face eternal judgement and damnation just because I'm afraid of offending them or they'll think I'm weird? I know this is a common fear that many people struggle with, but one I really hope we can overcome together as a fellowship.
I was definitely a lot better about sharing the gospel when I was younger. My first time was with Felix in 5th grade on the field of John Muir Elementary during lunch. The second time was with my good friend Johnson* (name changed), during freshmen year of high school. I was studying with him in the library at Lynbrook after school when I brought up this cool post about the Professor & the Student (http://www.godandscience.org/apologetics/professor.html) that I had recently read. Knowing that Johnson was a thinker, I attempted to demonstrate how God really did exist and tried sharing with him from my own meager personal experiences. Johnson was intrigued, and promised to come with me to church. He did, for the next several weeks, and about a month later at a youth outreach he gave his life to Christ.
Here's where I failed. Johnson came to our church for almost a full year while we still met at De Anza college. Then he stopped coming. It started off as just one Sunday, and then a few more, until every time I asked him about it at school he always had some excuse not to come. Rather than following up or praying for him, I let him be. I had other things, bigger things, more important things on my mind, things that right now I don't even remember. Johnson told me at the end of sophomore year that he just didn't believe anymore, that he hadn't experienced God for himself and science had too many good answers. He said he need "time to explore" and to find answers to his questions. He asked me to respect his decision, and I did. I never invited him to church again.
Johnson and I grew apart after we both went to college. He attended UCLA, where he joined a frat, pierced his ears, joined a dance team, and started wearing designer jeans. Today, he works in LA and plans on applying to Harvard or UPenn business school, and has the GPA and GRE score to back it up. Unfortunately, I don't think he's stepped foot since the last time he was at ours in high school.
Upon reflecting, I realized that my greatest failure through this whole experience was that I lacked compassion and love. There were so many times that I could have prayed with Johnson, encouraged him, read the Bible with him, or directed him towards those with more experience. Instead, I left him to swim on his own thinking that he'd figure it out when he was ready, and in the end, his faith couldn't withstand the waves of doubt that overcame his fledgling Christian life. I understand that this isn't all my fault, and that perhaps no matter how hard I tried Johnson was going to become an atheist anyway. But the point is, I didn't try, mostly because I didn't care enough to try.
This week we've challenged the youth to each think of one friend that is unsaved and to start praying for them everyday. I've already missed 3 days, and it's gotten me thinking: "how much do you love your friends?" Do I really love them enough to want to see them in eternity? Or do I just kind of care, sometimes, when I can remember? I think the takeaway from all this that evangelism must be born out of love, otherwise it's just going to be a task we do, a check mark on our list, a scoresheet we bring to heaven and say, "Look God, I did it this many times!" And that's really what Jesus tells us to do. Love your neighbor. Love your friends, and those people He put in your life. Love 'em enough to share the gospel.
Sorry I know this is super long, if you made it this far, I really do love you.
These past few days I've been trying to stay away from watching tv during the day. I thought about reading The Hunger Games since all of my friends are into that right now. My friends gave me PDF files to all 3 books and David lend me the first book a few weeks ago. But for some reason I felt I should read something more useful. I picked up a copy of One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven this past Sunday and started reading it.
I've only read the first half of the book, so I should probably read the whole thing before judging it. So far the book is just stories after stories of the author's experiences with evangelism. I don't think he gave me any pointers or tips or anything advice on how to approach people yet.
After reading over a dozen stories on evangelism, I've pretty much come to the conclusion that evangelism is something you just gotta do. If you love your friends, you can't be afraid of rejection because ultimately if you love your friends, you gotta save them from hell. The worst thing that can happen is you lose a friend for 20~30 years. But the reward is so much greater: they get to spend eternity with God.
The author never starts off a conversation telling people they need Jesus or else they will burn in hell. He always starts off with questions such as "How certain are you that you will wake up tomorrow?" or "If you were to die tonight are you 100% sure you'll make it to heaven?" or "What do you think happens when we pass away?" The author never mentions this but it is more important to build a relationship with someone than to shove something in their face. He draws out the curiosity of people and engages in conversation with anyone he sees because he knows everybody needs Jesus.
I know we can all learn to step out of our comfort zones and reach out to pretty much everyone we run into. I wish I can say this is how my past experiences with evangelism have been but its far from it. I've never really had the passion for evangelism until after this one retreat. It was a week long retreat and we studied the bible for 8 hours a day. All we did was eat, sleep, and manuscript the bible. During that week I learned so much about Jesus and the bible. I was so glad I went and couldn't wait to share what I had discovered.
For the next two weeks I scheduled to meet up with a different person everyday. I wanted my friends to know about all the interesting things in the bible that I just figured out. I started off the conversations just catching up with my friends. It was easy to bring up the retreat since it was during spring break and I was pretty much the only one that stayed in socal for the retreat.
In the end the majority of my friends all said "that's cool and all but its not for me." One guy wanted to know about everything I learned during the retreat but once school started he didn't have time for Jesus.
This is not what any of you want to read but since then I've pretty much stopped evangelizing to my friends. These friends are the ones I've known for years and have invited them to church or bible study over a dozen times. The weeks following the retreat was when I was SUPER passionate about Jesus and the bible and if none of my friends wanted to have anything to do with it, why should I keep trying? Evangelism is not for me. Someone else can put up with it.
Earlier this post I wrote about how if I truly care about my friends, I can't give up on them. Even though my friends think they don't need Jesus, I really care about them so I have to be willing to face that rejection. I'll probably be rejected or laughed at but I can't give up on them. I guess evangelism is something I still gotta do.
My Experience Sharing the Gospel
First and second year of college I lived a suite with these three non-christians who will not be named. They knew I was a christian, even though I didn't always act like one. As a we grew to be closer friends I had a bigger and bigger burden to share the gospel to them. So, one time I decided to invite them to a gospel night that our small group was having. I had such high hopes, thinking that if we were able to answer all of their questions, they would be saved. I thought to myself that if only they could understand what the gospel was really about then of course they would want Jesus.
So that night they came to the bible study and we debated and discussed every christian topic you could think. All of the hard questions came up and I had to dig deep, using all of my bible knowledge and logic to try to answer any question that they had. At the end of the night my friends left more resistant to Jesus than when they came in. Their conclusion of the night was that our faith was narrow-minded and uncompromising. I continued to try to invite them to different church gatherings and received more rejections than I can remember. Although they liked me as a friend and respected my faith, I couldn't find a way in.
In my second year, we continued to live together and our friendships continued to grow. Thankfully they continued to ask questions about my faith especially when it came to controversial political or scientific issues such as abortion or creationism. Then one night we were all hanging out randomly in one of the guy's rooms. We were casually talking and the topic of my faith came up. Our discussion got deeper and deeper as the night went on. I was determined to do it right this time. So I shared everything I knew about the gospel starting from the old testament to the new, about sin, God's promise, and salvation. I shared my own personal testimony without leaving out a single detail. Time flew by and before we knew it, it was already 4:00 am.
As much as I tried to explain and share, I came to a realization that night. Faith in Jesus cannot be convinced in someone through logic. I tried to tell them why salvation makes sense but it all came down to whether or not God is real. The only way to know whether or not God is real is to encounter him. But the only way to have a personal encounter is if its PERSONAL. I think for me that's the difficulty with evangelism, because after hours and hours of talking and explaining, it still comes down to a personal choice.
I still invite those friends to any church events that come up, but they're tired of saying no and just no longer respond. I still hope that someday the holy spirit will bring them to the place where they want more out of this life.
-Joseph
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Just Do It
"Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations..." Matthew 28:19
To be honest, evangelism isn't a big part of my life. It's barely even a little part of my life. When it comes to teaching and building up young believers, that's not a huge problem for me. But when it comes to people who don't know Jesus and I feel like I need to preach the Gospel to them, I'm utterly lost. I've grown up knowing the importance of spreading the Gospel but I've always thought that it didn't have anything to do with me. Surely there are other people God called in order to spread His kingdom!
Most of my friends know that I'm a Christian, mostly from what I do on Friday nights and Sundays. And how I close my eyes to give grace before a meal. But I've never actually shared anything with them, and whenever I'm asked how church was it's always, "Good". From what I can see in myself, self consciousness is a huge reason why I've never been active in sharing my faith. When I was younger I would always have an issue of confidence and being self conscious of every single action that I did, always feeling like I wasn't good enough for anything. I tried my hardest to "fit in" with my friends, only to see that I never really did. I never denounced my faith but I didn't speak up when others were ridiculing it either. I dreaded to think how others would view me if they knew that I loved Jesus, most afraid of being labeled one of those "Christian losers".
One of the only times I've actually actively spread the Gospel I did for my own selfish reasons. When I was in middle school I really liked this girl who was one of my best friends, but I knew it was wrong to date non-Christians. So whenever she felt down or something bad was happening in her life I would always bug her to go to church and give Jesus a chance. Only many years later did I realize the negative impact that I had in actually spreading the Gospel to her; I was merely doing it for my own gain.
So this past Sunday there were three newcomers who just came to America to study English. When everybody went to go clean I felt kind of bad that they would be by themselves so I stuck around to try to talk to them a little bit. We ended up talking about Christianity and religion and I found myself explaining how Christianity isn't about a religion but more of a relationship. That's what makes Christianity different from all the other religions, we don't do things in order to gain our salvation. While I was sharing it felt like a really different experience, one that I hadn't felt in a long time and in my head I could only think, "Wow I'm actually doing this".
But then today I grabbed lunch with a friend that I haven't really hung out much because we have different schedules this quarter. I know that God has put him on my heart to invite him to our church but I've always come up with different kinds of excuses. He's from China and it's hard for him to get along with his roommates here. He also finds America really boring because he doesn't do anything except stay in his room all day, the only thing he can do. I know that I should invite him to Rainbow but I've always said to myself that I wouldn't be able to be with him so that wouldn't be good. And other excuses of the sort. And even today, I couldn't even bring myself to talk about God or religion. The only thing that he shared was, "I dropped a class because the English was difficult for me; it had to do with God which is so boring." Then I pretty much didn't even want to mention God in front of him so it wouldn't have a negative impact on him.
So all in all, I don't really know what I'm trying to say. These are just some of the experiences I've went through of sharing the gospel. This is definitely something I need to work on and recently through our discussions of getting the youth to invite their friends, I am starting to realize the lack on my part of evangelism and reaching out to non-Christians. But no matter how we feel I think Jesus' command sums it up quite nicely. He says, "Go!" There should be no hesitation, no excuses. This is one of those things that we need to Just Do It.
To be honest, evangelism isn't a big part of my life. It's barely even a little part of my life. When it comes to teaching and building up young believers, that's not a huge problem for me. But when it comes to people who don't know Jesus and I feel like I need to preach the Gospel to them, I'm utterly lost. I've grown up knowing the importance of spreading the Gospel but I've always thought that it didn't have anything to do with me. Surely there are other people God called in order to spread His kingdom!
Most of my friends know that I'm a Christian, mostly from what I do on Friday nights and Sundays. And how I close my eyes to give grace before a meal. But I've never actually shared anything with them, and whenever I'm asked how church was it's always, "Good". From what I can see in myself, self consciousness is a huge reason why I've never been active in sharing my faith. When I was younger I would always have an issue of confidence and being self conscious of every single action that I did, always feeling like I wasn't good enough for anything. I tried my hardest to "fit in" with my friends, only to see that I never really did. I never denounced my faith but I didn't speak up when others were ridiculing it either. I dreaded to think how others would view me if they knew that I loved Jesus, most afraid of being labeled one of those "Christian losers".
One of the only times I've actually actively spread the Gospel I did for my own selfish reasons. When I was in middle school I really liked this girl who was one of my best friends, but I knew it was wrong to date non-Christians. So whenever she felt down or something bad was happening in her life I would always bug her to go to church and give Jesus a chance. Only many years later did I realize the negative impact that I had in actually spreading the Gospel to her; I was merely doing it for my own gain.
So this past Sunday there were three newcomers who just came to America to study English. When everybody went to go clean I felt kind of bad that they would be by themselves so I stuck around to try to talk to them a little bit. We ended up talking about Christianity and religion and I found myself explaining how Christianity isn't about a religion but more of a relationship. That's what makes Christianity different from all the other religions, we don't do things in order to gain our salvation. While I was sharing it felt like a really different experience, one that I hadn't felt in a long time and in my head I could only think, "Wow I'm actually doing this".
But then today I grabbed lunch with a friend that I haven't really hung out much because we have different schedules this quarter. I know that God has put him on my heart to invite him to our church but I've always come up with different kinds of excuses. He's from China and it's hard for him to get along with his roommates here. He also finds America really boring because he doesn't do anything except stay in his room all day, the only thing he can do. I know that I should invite him to Rainbow but I've always said to myself that I wouldn't be able to be with him so that wouldn't be good. And other excuses of the sort. And even today, I couldn't even bring myself to talk about God or religion. The only thing that he shared was, "I dropped a class because the English was difficult for me; it had to do with God which is so boring." Then I pretty much didn't even want to mention God in front of him so it wouldn't have a negative impact on him.
So all in all, I don't really know what I'm trying to say. These are just some of the experiences I've went through of sharing the gospel. This is definitely something I need to work on and recently through our discussions of getting the youth to invite their friends, I am starting to realize the lack on my part of evangelism and reaching out to non-Christians. But no matter how we feel I think Jesus' command sums it up quite nicely. He says, "Go!" There should be no hesitation, no excuses. This is one of those things that we need to Just Do It.
Nails done, Jesus done, Everything DID
disclaimer: these are NOT my nails.
So when I went to my regular nail spot yesterday to get em did, I was hooked up with this nail lady who is not my regular nail lady since I didn't make an appt. As soon as I sat down, I noticed a little Buddha on the desk, and suddenly I knew the Holy Spirit was prompting, especially since we've been emphasizing sharing the Gospel lately. My first thought was, "REALLY, God? You are not gonna make me share the Gospel with my nail lady today. This is expert level on evangelism - she's a stranger! And usually I need to prepare myself and pray first and get in the zone to share the Gospel. I'm not ready today, but next time."
So fortunately, I gauged that she wasn't a talker. (Usually, they spend the whole time without engaging in conversation with you, or they'll start asking questions like "Do you have boyfrienddd?") But then she started talking about how it has been hard for her to sleep lately, and I start asking her questions about that....which led into her talking about her being so stressed out...which led into how she was having financial problems....which led into her talking about how she doesn't know what to do with her life....and how her life is really hard right now.....
She wasn't really being a Debbie Downer, but you could tell that she was genuinely hurting. We were having a really genuine conversation, and at one point, she got teary-eyed and needed to take a break for some kleenex. But at this point I realized that God was setting the stage up for me to share about Jesus. No doubt I was scared though. I honestly didn't know where to start, and the whole time I was praying for God to just give me the right words...
Finally, after some silence, I asked her if she ever prayed. She said she prayed to Buddha and one time even with a Catholic person at the church she walks around for exercise sometimes, but bad things always happen to her right after so she said that doesn't help. I was like, "Oh no, roadblock! Okay now what." Then I said, "You don't know what to do, you've tried everything..and if there's one last thing for you to try, then trust in Jesus." I shared with her a short testimony of how Jesus has changed my life, especially during the hard times how he's been my hope and peace. She really didn't have much to say after that, but she let out this big sigh and then she changed the conversation. Her coworker and another customer came in to sit down next to us too so I got scared to continue the conversation.
When she was done with my nails, we were talking about where I work, and I invited her to come to church. At first she said she was too busy, and then later she said that hopefully she can go to our church one day. Even though she finished my nails, she sat there and continued to just let out how she's been feeling lately. Since I had to go to class, I took out my wallet to show her it was time for me to go though. We went up to the front and she said she usually doesn't share her stuff with people, and she didn't want to say in front of her coworkers but she is always going through some really bad family problems. As I finished paying, I gave her a hug and held her hand and from the bottom of my heart I told her that again, she needed to trust in Jesus alone and to really believe in Him, and everything would be okay.
Even though I don't know if she will, I asked God to consistently keep her in my prayers so when I come back in 3 weeks, she can testify that her life has changed in some way. Then our Lord Jesus can take the credit and prove that He is the only one that is faithful and true, and worthy to be accepted in our lives. Hopefully we can continue our convo from there. I totally didn't expect that Jesus would be in our conversation before I walked into the nail salon. But God reminded me after that there are so many people in need of Him because of we are so limited as humans, there comes a point where we will lose control of our lives and we need a Savior not only for our situations but for our very souls.
Even though I didn't get to go into the full Gospel story with her, the experience of sharing about Jesus was not as scary as I thought. We have a lot of fears when it comes to sharing the Gospel - for her it was fear that I would be offending her Buddhist beliefs. There will be times that the Gospel is offensive, but it is never to be regretted - it's the TRUTH! When it comes to sharing with the people I love most, I fear rejection and disapproval....
For the longest time it's been hard for me to follow up with my friend Andrea since she accepted Christ during our last outreach event. There have been many opportunities and long drives between SJ and SSF with her, but thankfully God prompted me to finally follow up with her about her relationship with Jesus and guide us into that conversation last night. I'm excited for this because she can be my soul sista and partner in changing our homegirls for Jesus too! Pray for her to really understand the value of a personal relationship with Jesus.
And last night my sister slept over and we talked about Jesus in her life. Since she accepted Christ, I could see that God is changing her to rely more on Him. He's even changing her desires to live for Him and not herself anymore. But right now she is in a hard place in her life and she doesn't have a church family, so please pray for her too.
Sorry this was super long, but God can use us to bring His Kingdom on earth. I realized that sharing the Gospel is a lot easier when we constantly remember that this is what we are called to do as his followers. Always be prepared for any situation, any moment.
"Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not. Patiently correct, rebuke, and encourage your people with good teaching." - 2Timothy 4:2
"Instead, you must worship Christ as the Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your Christian hope, always be ready to explain it." - 1 Peter 3:15
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